The purpose of training is to tighten up the slack, toughen the body, and polish the spirit.
~Morihei Ueshiba~
Luca
Nothing prepared me for the loneliness I felt when we landed in Italy. Zion and Matteo walked beside me in silence; between the three of us, only Matteo seemed to be in high spirits. I sometimes forget how jazzed he could be at the track. The idea that we were a few hours away from starting vigorous training in preparation for Abu Dhabi Grand Prix had him in a rush of excitement.
It was early evening; the breeze hit my face immediately after my feet hit the ground, the city skyscrapers reigning tall with bright lights making the city come to life.
With only a small bag in my left hand, I walked faster out of the airport, my face on the ground to prevent people from recognising me even though we walked out through a private lounge. One could never be too careful. The last think I wanted was people shoving their phone cameras at me.
My phone rang just before we spotted our ride, a white Land Rover. I knew it was ours when I saw Javier leaning on it, a cigarette at the corner of his lips, one of his muddy black boots carelessly resting on the back tyre. Javier was the son of one of my father’s friends, Jesús. I have not heard many stories of the two of them, but I remember one particular unforgettable moment when my dad told me Jesús was there when my mother announced, publicly so, that I was my father’s son and not her then-husband.
“Why the hell are your boots so f*****g muddy?” I asked, standing next to him. He smirked, blowing smoke on my face.
I frowned, scrunching my nose to keep from smelling the smoke. “You're disgusting sometimes.” he gave me a cocky smile, sliding his foot to the ground. “Welcome back home, amigo.” I didn't acknowledge his welcome; I was busy fighting the urge to slap the smugness off his face. I opened the door he had been leaning on and slid into the car, leaving the other two with him.
Javier’s family was predominantly Mexican; his mother, however, was Italian. In a way, or so I've heard, my father sent her to his father’s club on the day my stepdad was killed. He never thought Jesús would marry her, but he did. A year later? Javier was born. He was Alessa’s age. More disrespectful, a smart-a*s, a crazy bastard, yet loyal. He was a master of manipulation and faking documents, which is why he was here to pick us up. He was not old enough to drive; he was using a fake driver's license.
Pulling out my phone from my pocket, my heart in my throat thinking it was Lia, I put in the password to find my trainer's name Sam, diminutive for Samuele, displayed as a missed call. I sighed with disappointment, my eyes fixed on the screen. I called back after a few minutes of getting over the misplaced feeling of dismay.
“Are you avoiding my calls?” Came his booming hoarse voice. I could picture him pacing, one hand in his pocket, a furrow on his forehead. I had been gone for two weeks, one week more than we had agreed.
“No, Sam. I just landed.” I told him. “I'm sorry I've been M.I.A, I added more loudly over the other's voices.
I heard him hiss, and I leaned back on the seat, running my hand through my hair, then withdrawing it so fast, like I had been burned when I remembered Lia doing the same, especially that last time in the bathroom.
“You realise I'm going to be relentless when we start training tomorrow?”
“I Wouldnt expect anything less,” I said, finally feeling a tiny smile stretching across my lips.
“How is our star doing?” Javier asked loudly so I could hear him; the question timed perfectly with the end of my phone call.
“Strong enough to beat your a*s,” I replied, dropping the phone in my coat pocket.
“How are your mom and dad?” I asked before he could trigger the last knob of my patience with another comment. He shrugged and then added, “fine, I guess.” he answered like the teenager he was.
“Does that mean you don't know whether they are okay?” He moved like he wanted to turn his head towards me, then remembered he was driving.
“I said they're okay, didn't I?” I heard the irritation in his voice as the traffic light flashed red “No. You said you guess they're fine.”
“What the f**k is the difference?”
“Guess is the operative word here. It means you're not sure and therefore taking a guess.”
“f**k you, Luca!”
I laughed, not loudly, because I didn't want to piss him too much, but just a little to irk him.
“You shut up!” I heard Zion’s annoyed tone. “I swear, Javier, if you say one more word, I will chock you to death,” he added; in a bored yet cold voice.
Javier did not talk after that. It was interesting that he was more afraid of Zion than me, considering I was my family's next don.
When the light turned green, Javier drove off inside one of our family's legal business, where we would take a helicopter from the rooftop to take us home.
I was the last to get out of the car, pulling the bag behind me. I stood in front of Javier, looking at him until he averted his gaze, peering at him while he made a production out of searching for a cigarette. He found it, and I watched him put it between his lips, “you're too young to be a chain smoker or a smoker, for that matter.” I told him in a gentle voice, pulling it out of his mouth and dropping it in my pocket. I didn't smoke; I would throw it away when I got home.
He glowered at me, and I ignored him.
“Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn't I?” he shot back.
I almost groaned in frustration. Why the hell were teenagers this difficult?
“I'm preparing for the Abu Dhabi grand prix; want to come to help me train? “ his eyes gleamed with excitement, making his face softer. He nodded, and I put my forehead on his for a heartbeat, “tell your parents I said hallo.” I told him as I ran after the others. “And don't worry, your badge will be ready when you drive through the gate. My team will be expecting you.”
Something was bothering him; I could tell. Inviting him to be with me meant I could keep an eye on him since I would be swamped in the next couple of months of training to think of anything else. And it would be impossible for him to cause any trouble because he liked being on the racetrack.
When the helicopter landed, Matteo immediately picked the role of my assistant. “Can this wait until tomorrow?” I asked him when we entered the house, his excited voice following closely behind me.
“Why? You want to spend the evening sulking?”
I stopped, and he bumped on my back. “First, I never sulk,” he stared at me with a hint of humour lurking in his eyes as if he was thinking, oh please! I ignored the look, “and second, “I think you can tell me my schedule tomorrow morning on our way to the training centre.”
“But I want to tell you now.” He looked as if he was about to throw a tantrum.
“I understand you're excited, but I need to rest.”I told him over my shoulders, sprinting toward my room to avoid any arguments, not that it had ever stopped him before.
“You should be awake by five,” I heard him say as I rounded the corner of the stairs.
“I know that.”
Pushing my bedroom door open, I looked around the room; it felt strange, I thought, remembering Lia’s big bed, our bodies snuggled in the middle.
I needed to stop thinking about her if I wanted to win my next race. She was a distraction; the mere thought of her gave me a b***r. It would be uncomfortable if it were to happen with my team around.
That, however, didn't mean I wouldn't talk to her; I planned on calling her every chance I got. Matteo would have something to say about it, but he will get used to it eventually.
Opening the balcony door, I stepped out, breathing in the night air and enjoying the wind in my hair. I sighed, wrapping my hands across my chest, thinking of my next couple weeks. I expected it to be intense, just like all my training sessions, but the only difference was Lia. She was finally mine, all mine, to kiss, hug as close as I wanted, make love to, and dirty talk to. I couldn't wait to see how this would unfold. But first, I had a race to prepare because there was no way I was losing this, my first racing competition after we officially started dating.
I stood there for a few minutes, lost in the present and the past, before going back inside to find Zion sprawled on top of my bed.
“Dont you have your own bedroom?” he didn't answer or acknowledge my presence. His eyes were closed, hands on both sides of his head, his unsteady breathing the only evidence that he wasn't asleep.
“You know, you're beginning to walk like uncle Rom, his feather-like steps. I didn't even here you enter.”
Still no words. I turned to the couch at the corner of the room, removing my coat and placing it beside my head as I laid it on the arm.
Closing my eyes, I waited patiently for him to talk. To initiate the conversation since he had shot down both of my attempts.
“Do you know why Serena went with Lia?”
The mention of Lia had my heart jolt like an electricity static. The memories of us in the last two weeks were driving me crazy. But I blocked them, temporarily to focus on what Zion was asking.
“Shouldn't you have asked her that before we left?” I asked feigning ignorance. Yes, I had noticed the undercurrents between them. The pure unadulterated longing in his eyes on Serena when he thought no one was looking.
He gave me an exasperation look, daring me to pretend I didn't know what was happening.
“Did you two fight?” I asked, sitting down, my hands clasped together. Fatigue was beginning to catch up with me. I needed enough sleep to survive tomorrow being the first day back.
Another stretch of silence. If I didn't drag this out of him, we could spend the rest of the night here.
“No,” he pronounced. Sitting up, his face angled toward mine. “I think we are going through what happened to you and Lia.” He sighed, sniffling two times before he looked at me again.
“You had s*x?” I whispered, shocked and appalled. Serena was young, though it was hypocritical of me to think that when she was nineteen and Lia had been Fourteen. And Zion was just two years older than her. It wasn't overly bad.
“No! You f*****g bastard.”
Was that relief I felt? I didn't dwell much on it because I asked, “then how is it the same with Lia and me?”
Zion's eyes widened, almost coming off their sockets. I had never seen him that surprised.
“You had s*x with Lia?” I wanted to smile. That question opened floodgates of memories of Lia on top of me, me on top of her, her body lying on the dining table, the way she bobbed on my lap that one early morning when we sat out on the balcony.
“But you left when you were fourteen.”
“I know.”
“Is that why you left?”
I nodded.
“How the hell did you have s*x with her when she was that young?”
“In case you forgot, Lia and I are the same age.” I hissed, glaring at him.
“But men are different.”
“I wasn't a man then; I was a boy.”
He moved his gaze away, but I caught a glint of sadness. “I don't want to spend ten years avoiding Serena. I can't even handle one day; how the hell am I supposed to last that long.”
I shrugged, “then go to her.”
He jumped out of the bed, pointed a finger at me and said, “you're right. I will be away for a week. I need to see Sebastian anyway.”
“Fine. Get out of my room then; I need to sleep.”
Aksara