YOLANDA
Kyle stops outside my father’s yard and looks at me. My eyes stay focused on the house as my mind plays the flashbacks of the night of my birthday. It is a new year and I have gotten my matric results, and the first thing that I did was visit my mother’s grave before I asked Kyle to drive me to my father’s place, but now, I am sceptical to even get out of the house.
“Babe, tell me how you feel,” Kyle says and holds my hand. Only now do I turn to look at him.
“I feel scared. What if I find him drunk and he wouldn’t recognise me again, Kyle?”
“Then we will come back again next time, baby. Look, you just passed with five distinctions; we should be celebrating instead of worrying. Many of us are proud of you, Yolanda… I am proud of you. You should be happy,”
I sigh and put out my weak smile.
“I am happy, babe,”
“Then look like it, sweetheart,” He lifts my hand to his mouth and pecks the back of it.
“You are right, Kyle.” I lean towards him and kiss him on the lips. “Wait for me here,”
“I am not going anywhere, baby girl,”
I get out of the car with a heavy heart and saunter towards the front door. I ring the doorbell twice and wait to be responded to, but I get none. I ring the bell one last time, but I am still not getting any response. I sigh in disappointment, and just as I turn, there he is, standing right in front of me.
He looks clean, and sober, and smells so good, better than the last time I was here. This is my father, the only father that I know.
“Baba,” I think I mouthed it out.
“Oh, my little angel… come here,” He says, emotionally as he opens his arms. I don’t even wait another minute before I step forward to throw myself on him and cry in his arms. “It’s okay, Yolanda, it’s okay,”
No, it is not. He hasn’t been in my life for a long time. I feel like I am in Khumbul’ ekhaya right now because I do miss my birth home.
“Let’s get inside.”
****
Kyle sent me a text saying my father and I looked like we needed to talk, so he left, and I should call him when I need to leave. Now I am in the house in the lounge with my father because we do indeed have a lot to talk about.
I am sad, heartbroken, and disappointed in my father because he is so happy and emotional to see me, yet he did not take the effort to come to me. I had to be the one to take the first step.
“I am ashamed of myself, Yolanda. I should have never neglected you the way I did, but I promise you that there is no day I never thought about you.,”
“You were unreachable, dad. I left you a couple of messages on your phone, but you never responded to them. You couldn’t call me. When mom died, I needed you more than anything; I needed to come home, dad,”
He shamefully looks down and buries his face in his hands.
“I know, and as much as I would like to explain myself, there is no excuse for neglecting you. I should have been there for you, despite how angry I was at your mother. I loved her so much and finding out that she died felt like a knife piercing through my heart. I wanted to come to the funeral, but I just couldn’t. I am sorry, baby… please forgive me,”
My tears stream down my eyes. I want to move on with my life and I came here bearing good news.
“I forgive you, dad,”
“I am going to make it up to you, baby girl. I promise. And I am sorry for ruining your birthday,”
“It’s okay, dad.” I wipe my tears with the back of my hands and smile. “I passed with six distinctions,” I announce.
He stands up and smiles.
“Follow me,” He orders.
We get to my bedroom and the first thing that I see is a small beautifully wrapped gift box on my bed. I look at him sceptically and lift my eyebrow.
“I have been waiting for this day for too long, and now that it is finally here, I am so excited and happy. I have already found out about your results, and child, I have never been prouder than I am now. I never doubted you, and I am glad to see that you can conquer every obstacle life throws at you. Go on and open it,”
I want to ask him what it is, but I am afraid I would ruin the surprise. I take the box and look at it, but before I could unwrap it, I hug my father really tight.
“Thank you, dad. I missed you so much, and I really thought a lot about you. I wondered if you still thought about me too, and this just answered me. Thank you,” I cry and let go of him.
“Oh, now you are making me cry, sweetheart.” He says, looking up at the ceiling. “I love you, Yolanda Xaba. I have always been so proud of you, and never did you ever disappoint me,”
“And I won’t start now, baba,”
I unwrap the box and when I open it, I find two different keys placed inside it. One is of a car, and one is of a door of a house. I raise my head and look at him with excitement on my face.
“Is this what I think it is? Did you buy me a car and an apartment like you promised when started my final year of high school?”
“Exactly that, honey. Congratulations on your achievement, and I cannot wait until you become a doctor,”
For a minute, I did not know what to say to him. I wish my mom was here and witness this moment between me and dad. I want it to last forever.
“I love you, dad.” I wrap my arms around him, and he does not hesitate to hold me tight. My phone rings, breaking the hug between my dad and I. I growl in annoyance as soon as I see who it is and roll my eyes.
I reject the call and place my phone in silence. I won't let my stepdad ruin this moment with my dad for me. I have been waiting for this day for too long and I do not want to waste a second of it.
****
Aksara